Getting Unstuck: How to Take ControlApr 30, 2023
Life punches everybody in the nose, and it hurts.
It's easy to curl up in the fetal position and wait until the wave passes. We all want to protect ourselves from being hurt again. It's normal.
The problem is that doing nothing or being irrational keeps us stuck in the victim's role of feeling powerless over what's happening.
You have control over your attitude, ownership, and the next step you take.
1. Seek reality.
Take time to understand what happened. Are you assuming the impact is worse than it really is?
Separate fact from emotion. Look at what you have now, not what might happen. Gather data to help you separate fact from feeling. It is not the time to let fear of what might happen guide your thoughts, emotions, and actions.
2. Acknowledge reality.
Denying or minimizing what happened is as dangerous as avoiding a problem.
If an employee isn't working out, it's easy to tell yourself it's a phase, or maybe you think it's your fault for some reason.
You can—and should—see how your hiring process might be tweaked so that you make better hiring decisions going forward, but their actions aren't your fault.
3. Own your reality.
Blaming the economy or another person for a problem makes you a victim.
Removing your ego from the situation is probably the most challenging part of owning your reality, especially since we’re already reeling from what just happened. Our feelings are hurt. We will take things personally.
It takes energy to push past your emotions and to focus on the situation, but it’s a necessary part of navigating a problem.
Put your big girl pants on when it's time to deal with big girl problems. Own your part of what happened or what happens next.
4. Find solutions.
You don't always have power over what happens, but you always have control of your response.
Find potential solutions by making a list of your options, talking to people who have been in these situations, and researching how companies have responded.
Develop your action plan. It won't be perfect. Trust that you will learn and adjust as you move forward.
5. Get on with it.
In every aspect of your life, action is the cure for almost anything.
Staying stuck—whether it's your mindset, a financial nosedive, or the chair you're sitting in—is not an action.
In many situations, the only way you will know if the next step you take is right or wrong is to take that next step.
Girl, get on with it!
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