“No one will hire me, so I’m stuck.”
“I’m too old—or too young—to start a business.”
“It’s impossible to build an empire while my kids are young.”
No matter how successful you are, you believe something about yourself that’s just not true, and it limits your future success.
Limiting beliefs are unconscious truths we tell ourselves. We don’t even know they’re there.
Past experiences and fears about the future contribute to what we believe about ourselves, and we believe what society—and other people—say about us.
Here’s what the ongoing process looks like.
6 Steps to Overcoming Limiting Beliefs
The steps below aren’t something you can “knock out” in an hour of focus time. Consider each action item as an ongoing conversation with yourself and the people close to you.
Pushing through limiting beliefs—one after another—is part of your journey toward and through your big life and business.
Every woman who is building the life they want learns to work through negative self-talk.
1. Admit your limiting belief.
There’s a trick to this one. You probably even don’t know you have a limiting belief in a specific area. How are you supposed to own up to something you can’t see?
All of us have blind spots. You need someone in your life who will tell you where yours are, and then own up when your gut check tells you they’re right.
2. Recognize the difference between belief and reality.
We all assume our beliefs are absolute truth. You know people who confuse the two and you wonder why someone could be so confused.
Facts, logic, and objective observations support absolute truth. Limiting beliefs stem from subjective experiences, emotions, or cultural conditioning.
3. Challenge the belief.
You can distinguish between absolute truth and personal beliefs when you ask, “What evidence do I have to support this claim?”
Look at the same situation from someone else’s perspective. You can use any perspective you want.
- How would Oprah feel about this belief?
- What would (your favorite female business leader) say about this belief?
- How would you respond if your child told you they believe what you’re telling yourself?
4. Recognize the impact of limiting beliefs (consequences).
Once you realize your belief isn’t fact-based, you face a choice: change your mindset or accept self-imposed limitations. Consider the impact on your future and potential regrets.
Challenging a limiting belief affects not just you but your children, young mothers, and career-driven women who fear motherhood could disrupt their professional success.
What are the consequences of hanging on to this limiting belief?
5. Choose a new belief (commit to practice).
It's hard to change your beliefs. You must choose daily to reject something you’ve assumed for your entire life.
Train and retrain your brain to think the opposite. Affirmations (or some people call them commands) are a terrific tool for retraining your brain.
Whatever you believe you know now is untrue. Write an affirmation expressing the opposite.
6. Take action.
Write your affirmation on a sticky note or an index card — something you can slap on your bathroom mirror (we’ve got’chu with some here).
Wake up every day, look yourself in the mirror, and say, "I can have a big business and a family at the same time."
Being in any sort of rut requires immediate action. Do something tiny toward pushing through limitations that are between your ears.
Everyone deals with self-limiting thoughts and assumptions. Even when you conquer one, another will crop up. Most of us have limiting beliefs we spend our entire lives battling. It’s part of the process of building your empire.
Go live your big life!
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